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Shit show

July 28th, 2010 · Currently, Pop Culture, Weird and wacky

KINGS OF LEON had a shit show in St. Louis last week – literally.

During a concert Friday at the Verizon Amphitheatre, birds in the rafters pooped on the band and their equipment. After one of the droppings ending up in bassist Jared Followill’s mouth, the group ended the show.

“They couldn’t deal any longer,” their publicist said. “It’s not only disgusting, it’s a toxic hazard. They really tried to hang in there.”

Yech — sucks to be the bassist.

“We had 20 songs on the set list, by the end of the show, I would have been covered from head to toe,” Followill (right) said afterward, noting that the opening acts – The Postelles and The Stills – had been thoroughly crapped upon during their shows.

So it’s not like the pigeons hate Kings of Leon or anything. They weren’t discriminating Friday night.

And here I was thinking those shit-hawks were just sick of hearing “Sex on Fire.”

ryan@roadtostarrdom.com

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The biggest buzz of all

July 25th, 2010 · Around the World, Currently, Media Matters, Pop Culture, Weird and wacky

YOU’VE GOT to hand it to BrewDog – they sure know how to create a big buzz.

The Scottish brewery made headlines this week for producing a 55%-alcohol beer, ominously named the End of History.

“This blond Belgian ale is infused with nettles from the Scottish Highlands and fresh juniper berries,” the proprietors say on their blog.

Only 12 bottles of the stuff have been made. Oh, and did I mention that each one comes stuffed in either a dead stoat or the corpse of a grey squirrel?!

This is not a joke. Here’s the promo clip:

“The striking packaging was created by a very talented taxidermist and all the animals used were road kill,” the company reassures customers. “This beer is an audacious blend of eccentricity, artistry and rebellion; changing the general perception of beer one stuffed animal at a time.”

If you think that sounds intriguing enough to try, you’re too late. Those dozen bottles sold out right away and the brewer doesn’t plan to produce any more.

The dead-animal thing is a rather odd/gross marketing gimmick, but BrewDog says it’s goal is to “push the boundaries and challenge people’s perceptions about what beer is and how it can be enjoyed. We ultimately want to show people that there is an alternative to the mainstream, generic beers and make other people as passionate about craft beer as we are.”

End of History is BrewDog’s latest, and last, in a line of extreme-alcohol beers that also includes Tactical Nuclear Penguin (32% ABV) and Sink the Bismarck! (41% ABV). Whoever is in charge of naming these things deserves a raise.

The thought of drinking beer with that much alcohol sounds nasty to me, but apparently these super-brews are meant to be sipped slowly, like a fine whiskey.

BrewDog describes the End of History bottles – the ones that come in dead squirrels and stoats – as “at once beautiful and disturbing.”

I’ll say. I don’t know what’s more disturbing: the idea of drinking 55%-alcohol beer out of a stuffed rodent, or paying more than $1,000 for the pleasure. Fortunately, it looks like I’ll never get the chance to decide.

ryan@roadtostarrdom.com

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Keeping Apple honest

July 21st, 2010 · Around the World, Currently, Media Matters, Pop Culture

Even if the iPhone4 doesn't work properly, it's still nice to look at.

NEW YORK TIMES media columnist David Carr had an interesting piece in last Sunday’s paper looking at the role Consumer Reports played in the iPhone4-reception debacle.

The magazine said it can’t recommend the phone because of issues with the antenna, which wraps around the outside of the device. If the phone is held a certain way, dropped calls can result.

In an effort to manage this mess – Antennagate – Apple is offering to send iPhone4 buyers free “bumpers,” cases that wrap around the edge of the phone and appear to mitigate the problem. (Consumer Reports had suggested using duct tape.)

Apple CEO Steve Jobs at first denied there was an issue, and blamed the media for blowing the whole thing “so out of proportion that it’s incredible.” But he was forced into addressing the criticism, Carr notes, largely due to the editorial authority of Consumer Reports:

“The iPhone’s antenna problems might have remained a dust-up between Apple fanboys and skeptical bloggers except that Consumer Reports — that stolid, old-media tester of everything from flooring to steam mops for the last 74 years — came out with a report detailing the issue and concluding that ‘due to this problem, we can’t recommend the iPhone 4.’

“The article in Consumer Reports was devastating precisely because the magazine (and its Web site) are not part of the hotheaded digital press. Although Gizmodo and other techie blogs had reached the same conclusions earlier, Consumer Reports made a noise that was heard beyond the Valley because it has a widely respected protocol of testing and old-world credibility.”

Jobs acknowledged the impact of being dissed by the venerable mag: “We were stunned and upset and embarrassed by the Consumer Reports stuff,” he said, “and the reason we didn’t say more is because we didn’t know enough.”

Carr thinks the matter “is a reminder that media that are unsupported by advertising can often have an impact that more traditional publishing, or even the most tech-savvy, enterprises don’t.”

It was a coup for Consumer Reports, to be sure, even though they were simply doing what they always do. But I doubt the wacky-antenna hullabaloo will have much of an impact on this phone phenom’s sales. Apple has already sold more than three million iPhone 4s in the U.S., and on July 30 will begin peddling them in 17 other countries, including Canada.

Even if Apple doesn’t completely solve the reception problem, they can rest assured that Canadians, no strangers to crappy wireless service, likely won’t notice a difference.

ryan@roadtostarrdom.com

Related: Jobs is both a genius and a jerk

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Goosegate

July 17th, 2010 · Around the World, Currently, Oh Canada, Unusual Punishments, Weird and wacky

Not the most pleasant creature, but it's ours.

CANADA GEESE are a complete and utter nuisance.

They happen to bear this country’s name, and, as such, have come to be seen as a national symbol of sorts, along with Mounties, beavers and maple syrup.

But our default national bird can also be quite a pain, particularly beyond our borders.

Recall Canada geese were responsible for bringing down Capt. Chesley “Sully” Sullenberger’s US Airways Flight 1549 last January (to be fair, though, they could also be credited with helping him become an American hero, at least for a few weeks, until another one came along.)

Sadly, last week 400 geese in Brooklyn’s Prospect Park were rounded up and gassed over concerns they were endangering airplane flights.

Canada geese also shit a ton and always seem to leave piles of poo in their wake. And so in Oregon recently, another 109 of them were gassed, because “the birds had become a pest in local parks, and many people were disgusted by the goose droppings,” the Canadian Press reports.

I don’t like to hear about any animals being gassed, even if it’s a cull carried out by civic authorities in an effort to mitigate a problem. But I understand that it sometimes has to be done, and I suppose that’s the most humane way to do it. It happens here in Canada, too.

What baffles me, though, is what happened in New Jersey earlier this week when police discovered 18 geese that had been beaten and shot in the head in a parking lot near a pond. I realize we’re talking about New Jersey, the a-hole of America, but still, who does that?

Not surprisingly, the matter has sparked outrage here in the Great White North — Goosegate, it’s being called.

The controversy is for good reason — can you imagine if a Canadian were to slaughter a bunch of bald eagles, the national bird and quintessential symbol of the United States? Methinks the long-predicted American invasion of this ”freedom-hating” nation would be imminent.

ryan@roadtostarrdom.com

Related: Honk if you love the Canada Goose

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Bull-baiting boneheads

July 13th, 2010 · Around the World, Currently, Pop Culture, Sporting Life, Weird and wacky

THREE BONEHEADS ended up injured yesterday during the running of the bulls at the San Fermin Festival in Pamplona, Spain.

If you’ve never heard of it – and haven’t read Hemingway’s The Sun Also Rises – the bull run is a super popular annual event that essentially involves a bunch of idiots hustling down narrow cobbled-stone streets attempting to outrun a pack of stampeding bulls.

Apparently it’s quite the thrill. Not sure I see the appeal, though.

It’s not uncommon for participants to be trampled or gored, and the Pamplona bull runs have killed 15 people since 1911 – most recently last year. Seems like a pretty good example of social Darwinism hard at work.

All risks to humans aside, I don’t think it’s fair to be subjecting the bulls to this spectacle. Surely they can’t be happy about being coaxed into taking part.

Small wonder so many people get gored, then. If I were a bull in Pamplona, I’d be looking to shove my horn up some stupid tourist’s ass too.

ryan@roadtostarrdom.com

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Worst mother on earth

July 9th, 2010 · Currently, Uncategorized, Unusual Punishments, Weird and wacky

THERE ARE BAD parents. Then there are horrible, evil, menace-to-society parents.

It’s under the latter category you can place Tamara Broomfield (seen at right), a Toronto-area devil woman who fed her two-year-old son cocaine for more than a year, almost killing him at one point with an overdose.

The single mother, 28, was convicted last year for administering cocaine to her son, and of aggravated assault endangering life and assault causing bodily harm.

At the sentencing hearing yesterday, the judge described Broomfield’s actions as ”gross parental abuse over a prolonged period of time against a vulnerable and defenceless child.
[Read more →]

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Coney Island chaos

July 5th, 2010 · Around the World, Currently, Pop Culture, Sporting Life, Weird and wacky

One big pile o' disgustingness.

APPARENTLY THINGS got a wee bit crazy yesterday at the annual Nathan’s International July Fourth Hot Dog Eating Contest in Coney Island. 

So-called competitive eater Joey “Jaws” Chestnut won the championship after stuffing 54 hotdogs and buns down his throat in 10 minutes. Alas, the San Jose man fell short of his goal to eat 70 dogs in 10 minutes to beat his 2009 record of 68. 

Shortly after the victory, in a scene that sounds straight out of pro wrestling, not pro eating, Chestnut’s arch rival and six-time champion Takeru Kobayashi – who hadn’t entered the contest owing to a contract dispute with the organizer, Major League Eating — stormed the stage. 
[Read more →]

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Happy “Canada Day”

July 1st, 2010 · Currently, Oh Canada, Pop Culture, Toronto

I SPOTTED this sign last night as I was out “shopping”…

Here in Ontario, beer and liquor stores are government-controlled. That means they’re closed on holidays, every last one of ‘em. It’s a stupid system, and as with so many other services in this country, there’s no real alternative.

If you want a cold one on Canada Day to help celebrate our nation’s 143rd b-day, you have to plan ahead.
[Read more →]

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Good for Ghana

June 30th, 2010 · Around the World, Currently, Pop Culture, Sporting Life

Ghana fans: Lovin it.

CAN’T SAY I know all that much about football/soccer. Like most, though, I’ve been taking in the World Cup action whenever I can.

In a multicultural city such as Toronto, you simply can’t avoid the hoopla, and it’s been fun to watch the various ethnic communities around town reacting as their teams win or lose. (That said, I won’t miss the Koreans’ car horns blaring on the street outside my apartment.)

It’s not shocking to see most of the teams that have reached the quarter-finals. Brazil, Spain, Germany and Argentina etc. are the usual contenders. But I was surprised to see Ghana had made it through, by beating the U.S. no less.
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Wimble-dumb

June 26th, 2010 · Around the World, Currently, Pop Culture, Sporting Life

Isner: battered then beaten.

WIMBLEDON IS BIG on traditions. But this week’s marathon match has me thinking it’s time for some changes. 

Most tennis fans loved the 11-hour, three-day epic between John Isner and Thiemo de Bakker. It was decided 70-68 in the fifth set – the longest match in professional tennis history. 

I don’t really get it. Maybe it’s because this endless battle was between two nobodies, and it was only the first round.

Or perhaps it’s the fact it left the victor, Isner, so destroyed that he could barely cope at his match the following day – he lost in straight sets and got knocked out of the tournament. “I’ve never been this exhausted,” he said afterward. 
[Read more →]

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Sexymoto: January 2008 – June 2010

June 22nd, 2010 · Crossing Canada, Currently, Toronto

Sexymoto: In happier times (Jasper National Park, May 2009).

SEXYMOTO IS no mo.

My first-ever new car was involved in a pretty brutal accident a couple of weeks ago. Don’t feel like getting into too much detail here. Suffice it to say it was pretty rough, it wasn’t my fault (100 per cent not my fault, according to my insurance company) and no one was hurt too badly.

But if you must know, some dumb chick in a Volkswagen Tiguan was attempting to turn left across three lanes of traffic on Yonge Street, one of Toronto’s busiest drags. She cleared the first two lanes, but either didn’t see me coming in the third, or thought she could make it.

Regardless, I didn’t spot her until she darted in front of me at the last second and I plowed into her pretty much at full speed – a quintessential T-bone.
[Read more →]

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Canada’s very own Fox News

June 18th, 2010 · Currently, Media Matters, Oh Canada, Pop Culture

CANADIAN MEDIA COMPANY Quebecor announced this week it plans to launch Sun TV News, a right-wing all-news network that will take aim at the nation’s existing players: CBC and CTV. Here’s the promo:

The station — which will be fed by the Sun Media chain of newspapers – is promising “hard news” and “straight talk” when it launches Jan. 1.
[Read more →]

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Jobs: ‘I don’t want to see us descend into a nation of bloggers’

June 14th, 2010 · Around the World, Currently, Media Matters, Pop Culture

Apple CEO Steve Jobs. (Photo: Asa Mathat | All Things Digital)

EARLIER THIS MONTH at the D8 Conference near Los Angeles, Apple CEO Steve Jobs discussed the impact of his company’s latest gadget: the vaunted iPad.

In an interview, Jobs was asked whether this new technology – which, among other things, provides print-news organizations with a tool to offer digital content in a more engaging and interactive fashion than through conventional websites – will “save journalism.”

“One of my beliefs very strongly is that any democracy depends on a free healthy press,” Jobs said (a cliche, sure, but always nice to have the notion reinforced). “News gathering and editorial organizations are really important.”

What he said next came as a bit of a surprise to me, though, given how inextricably linked Apple is to the new-media world:
[Read more →]

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OK Leafs, stop being losers

June 10th, 2010 · Currently, Media Matters, Pop Culture, Sporting Life, Toronto

The front page of the Chicago Sun-Times captures the essence of the moment.GOOD ON the Chicago Blackhawks. The young squad finished off the tenacious Philadelphia Flyers in six games last night, ending the club’s 49-year Stanley Cup drought, the only Original Six team whose dry spell was longer than the Toronto Maple Leafs’.

What a strange goal to end it all, though. Other than Chicago forward Patrick Kane — who scored – no one in Wachovia Center, nor anyone watching at home on TV, knew where the puck had gone. The red light didn’t go off. Talk about anti-climactic. The moment wasn’t made any better by the dead silence of the Philly crowd:
[Read more →]

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