Happy holidays and talk to you in 2012!

But when it comes to helping raise awareness of men’s health issues, Movember has got some substantial competition from the Durham Region Health Department:

Not exactly sure what having people walk through a 40-foot-long colon helps to achieve, other than causing more than a few of the explorers to lose their lunch (hopefully not through their colons). Suppose that is the point: show you what colon cancer looks like, scare the shit out of you (again, hopefully not literally), and push you to take steps to prevent it.

As odd as a gigantic colon attraction might be – how many folks will be traipsing out to The Oshawa Centre for a stroll though it, you have to wonder – helping people to get more in touch with their vital organs is never a bad thing. Indeed, as far as the value of spending a few minutes to educate yourself is concerned, this 40-foot-long colon could hardly be considered a waste.

ryan@roadtostarrdom.com

HOW’S THAT FOR heeding a warning? Saw this head-shaking piece of work on the way into a Toronto-area hospital yesterday. If the genius driver responsible for the damage could read the sign, apparently he didn’t get the message.

ryan@roadtostarrdom.com

CANADIAN NOVELIST

The spur for the discussion was (surprise surprise) the recent launch of the Canadian arm of the Huffington Post, which Smith dubs “that unapologetic exploiter of eager, clever people.” He notes that the HuffPo, which doesn’t pay its writers, is being sued south of the border by a group of ex-contributors who “are keenly aware that the online magazine was recently sold to AOL for $315-million.”

The matter has prompted heated debate in both countries about the difference between “canny self promotion and slave labour,”  Smith writes. He continues:

The two sides are neatly divided by generation. Older writers, who have made a living from selling journalism, ghostwriting and corporate writing and who see their writing as a product with a quantifiable monetary value, are horrified that anyone would collaborate with the HuffPo, the Mordor of magazines. It’s not a start-up run by ambitious recent graduates, not an environmental or human-rights project, not a good cause of any kind, but the cash-cow possession of a giant media conglomerate. There is no question that the HuffPo can afford to pay, and pay well. You’d think it would be an easy target for a concerted boycott by Canadian writers.

But a recent graduate would say: It’s great for my career to publish (which is exactly what HuffPo says). I can publish an opinion piece, basically a blog entry, say anything I want, not be subject to rigorous editing or have to do any difficult research, and then I have something to my name. I’m building my brand. This will be good for me when I send my completed book of essays to an e-publisher, or when I go to investors to look for money to start my own online magazine (that I will then sell to AOL for a zillion jillion dollars).

Smith acknowledges that times have changed, and that older writers came of age in an era when there were limited outlets for their work, and as such, most were profitable; and making your mark was easier. Young writers today tend to wonder, “How are we supposed to get our voices known in an infinitely wider and more crowded room unless we speak loudly and often? We can’t afford to wait to be paid for it.”

The younger generation often doesn’t expect to be compensated for their imaginative work, Smith says, but maybe that’s not their primary concern. They’d rather have the exposure that a hugely popular site like HuffPo can provide. “They can get famous fast this way, and it’s gratifying to have a huge audience,” he writes.

What’s more, these writers can sound off on whatever topic they wish, and, unlike old-school young journalists, today’s aspiring scribes “never have to prove themselves by chasing down police radio calls on the night shift, or by writing a dozen numbing profiles on local hair-salon owners. They can go right into wise observations on Iraq and gender roles.”

Perhaps it is true that for today’s young writers, having a prominent place to share their thoughts and views is more important than making money. And fair enough. Problem is, they’re not operating in a vacuum. As Smith notes, their willingness to work for free stands to hurt the old farts. “If they don’t play along in the work-for-pay convention, then all of our incomes are undercut.”

Sadly, the argument that you get what you pay for becomes far less compelling when sites like the Huffington Post can make hundreds of millions on the backs of an army of narcissistic young slave labourers.

ryan@roadtostarrdom.com

Perhaps. But check out The New Yorker’s fabulous cover tribute to Jobs:

Says it all really, doesn’t it?

ryan@roadtostarrdom.com

NEGATIVE OPINIONS

This according to a new survey from the Pew Research Center for the People & the Press, which has been tracking press performance since 1985. According to a summary of the poll:

•66% of 1,501 respondents to the news attitudes survey say news stories “often are inaccurate;”

•77% think that news organizations “tend to favour one side;”

•80% say news organizations are often “influenced by powerful people and organizations;”

•And a quarter of those polled said that “in general news organizations get the facts straight,” while 66% said “stories are often inaccurate.”

Local news is more trusted than national news, the survey showed. Nearly 69% of respondents said they have a lot or some trust in information they get from local news organizations, while 59% say they trust information from national news organizations.

And though the media is certainly not held in high regard, at least news organizations are doing better with Joe Q. Public than government or corporations.

Half of those surveyed by Pew say they have “a lot or some trust” in information provided by their state government and the Obama administration. Smaller percentages trust information business corporations (41%), Congress (37%) or candidates running for office (29%).

I think the most interesting tidbit in the survey comes via a question on people’s awareness of news organizations. When asked what first comes to mind when they think of news organizations, 63% said the name of a cable news outlet (CNN and Fox News were most prevalent); about a third (36%) named one of the broadcast networks.

But only 5% mention a national newspaper such as the New York Times, Wall Street Journal or USA Today. And a mere 3% name a website, whether tied to a newspaper or not.

Sounds to me like a lot of couch potatoes who are super cynical and hyper-critical about TV news, but too lazy to get off their duffs and find an alternative.

ryan@roadtostarrdom.com

I CAME ACROSS this dumpster the other day, and had to look twice to make sure I’d read the sign correctly.

I’m pretty sure the guy who composed the message meant to write “garbage,” but then, what do I know – maybe there’s been a big problem of late with people tossing entire garages into dumpsters.

I can see how that would *drive* a contractor crazy.

ryan@roadtostarrdom.com

What on earth did you put in these brownies?!

Police in the provincial capital were called to an office building last week following reports of a possible poisoning. According to the Victoria Times Colonist: “Three employees, all at once, had been taken to hospital with similar symptoms, including light-headedness, numbness in the limbs and disorientation.”

“Investigations led to the office refrigerator and some brownies which, it turned out, had been baked with marijuana.”

Apparently the brownies were brought in by a woman who had discovered them in her freezer at home. Her stoner son later admitted to police that the treats were his, that he’d made them a year ago, and that – true to form! – he had forgotten about them.

“No action was taken, even though a criminal charge of possession of a controlled substance or administering a noxious substance could have been laid,” the Times Colonist notes. “However, it is expected that the son will take part in community work to hold him accountable.”

Part of that work will no doubt include hooking up those of his Mom’s office workers who tried the brownies, didn’t go to hospital, enjoyed the “light-headedness, numbness in the limbs and disorientation” – and want to know where they can’t get some more of that good shit.

ryan@roadtostarrdom.com

NEWSPAPERS TEND TO

Researchers at Tulane University have discovered a bacterial strain – TU-103 – that uses newsprint to produce butanol, a biofuel that can serve as a cheaper and more environmentally friendly substitute for gasoline.

TU-103 is the first bacterial strain from nature that produces 
butanol directly from cellulose, an organic compound found in all green plants – and “the most abundant organic material on earth,” the research team notes in a news release.

Nice to see that newspapers still have value in the digital age.

“Converting (cellulose) into butanol is the dream of many,” one of the scientists said. “In the United States alone, at least 323 million tons of cellulosic materials that could beused to produce butanol are thrown out each year.”

What’s more, the researchers note: “as a biofuel, butanol is superior to ethanol (commonly produced from corn sugar) because it can readily fuel existing motor vehicles without any modifications to the engine, can be transported through existing fuel pipelines, is less corrosive, and contains more energy than ethanol, which would improve mileage.”

And, compared to conventional gas, it would be much cheaper and produce less harmful emissions.

Newspapers: Not just for lining your birdcage anymore.

ryan@roadtostarrdom.com

Andy loses his shiz.

LOVE THE NOW-NOTORIOUS video of CNN anchor Anderson Cooper, consumed by an on-air giggling fit while discussing the story of French actor Gérard Depardieu getting tossed off an Air France flight after urinating (sort of) in the airplane cabin.

Cooper, normally a pretty serious guy but given to the occasional light-hearted moment, triggered his own laughter outbreak with a few puns that I think were quite clever – he spoke of Depardieu’s “jet stream” and concluded: “All I can say is they should thank their lucky stars it wasn’t Depar-two.”

That last one was particularly good. Good enough for Andy to embarrass himself on international TV? Not sure. But hey, who am I to judge? Maybe AC had a stressful day; perhaps he just thought his material really was that funny.

Regardless, anyone who’s ever tried to restrain themselves from laughing knows that it only makes it harder to do so. Behold the giggle fit:

ryan@roadtostarrdom.com